Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
He was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
What do you call a cow jumping over barbed wire? Utter destruction.
What college do cows go to?
The Mooniversity.
The grapes in the supermarket are really raisin' the bars...
What do you call a sleeping cow?
A bull-dozer.
Why was the cow afraid?
He was a cow herd.
What does a broken down vegetable say?
I need new wheels.
What do you call a stick that comes back a chicken?
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef.
I was going to tell you a cow joke...
But it's pasture bed time.
What did the cow say when it saw the farmer twice in one day?
"Deja moo!"
What did mama cow say to baby cow? -- "It's pasture bedtime."
One time, a cow saved my life.
It was bovine intervention.
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What is the difference between 9/11 and a cow?
You stop milking a cow after 15 years.
Why does a milking stool only have 3 legs? -- Because the cow has the udder.
Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work.
What do you call cows that have a sense of humor? -- Laughing stock.
Welcome to the Church of the Holy Cabbage.
Lettuce pray.
