Agriculture jokes
What did the grape say when the fox stepped on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Bestie Hannah heard that bestie Iz had a migraine! What did she do? She said, "My grains don’t hurt that much, at least not when the animals eat them!"
A farm full of cows were bombed, and only two survived. All of the udders died.
What is the difference between apples and orphans? Apples get picked!
A cow was standing in a corn field. The chicken walked by and said annoyingly, "What do I see here? Corned beef!?"
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Q: If there were two moo cows walking down the street, where would they be going?
A: Home to see their mama!
What is the difference between an orange and an orphan?
The orphan always gets picked... Oh wait, I meant an orange always gets picked.
A cow in an earthquake is called a milkshake.
What do orphans and apples not have in common? Apples get picked.
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
"Where is my tractor?"
What do you call a cow without legs?
Ground beef!
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Lean meat.
Old Mother Riley, had a fat cow.
She milked it and milked it but didn't know how, she pulled his tail, pulled his tits. Old Mother Riley was covered in sh!t.
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked.
Hey girl, are you a farmer? Because you sure know how to raise a cock.
Q: What do you call a cow stuck on a barb wire fence?
A: Udderly destroyed.
How do you get a country girl's attention? A tractor.
How do you get a country girl's attention? A tractor.
What do cows use for math? A cow-culator 😏