Agriculture jokes
A lady from the city and her traveling companion were riding the train through Vermont when she noticed some cows. "What a cute bunch of cows!" she remarked.
"Not a bunch, a herd," her friend replied.
"Heard of what?"
"Herd of cows."
"Of course I've heard of cows."
"No, a cow herd."
"What do I care what a cow heard? I have no secrets to keep from a cow!"
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
Nobody likes that joke.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
Nobody finds that one funny.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef.
Two of the worst jokes ever.
Why did the farmer name his pig Ink?
Because he kept on running out of the pen.
My friend had a house FULL of okra, but it blew up and okra was everywhere.
I guess you can call that place Okra-homa!
You: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Random person: Why?
You: To get to the idiot's house!
Random person: What?
You: Knock knock.
Random person: Who's there?
You: The chicken.
Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.
They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.
"Knock, knock?"
"Who's there?"
"Cow said."
"Cow said who?"
"Cow says moo you ding dong!"
What do you call a cow that sleeps?
A bulldozer! 🐄💤
What did one bean say to the other bean?
How you bean?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Cow.
Cow who?
Silly cows go moo!
What do you call a cow with 3 legs?
Lean beef!
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the “utter” side.
My name is Bob, and I am a cow.
My grandfather was a knight, and his name was Sir Loin.
Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don’t work.
What goes moo? Cow.
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Why did the ox get kicked out of the herd?
Because it wasn't being an ox, it was being a butt-ox...!
There are two cows in a field. One says to the other, "I'm cold. Are you cold?"
The other cow says, "Yeah, I'm Fresian."