Adult humor jokes

A teenage boy decides to go see a hooker for the first time and asks his experienced uncle for some tips.

"Uncle, what should I do about the hooker name? Should I ask her real name or should I come up with a name for her myself?"

"Kid, I've been fucking hookers for 20 years and I didn't even know they had names."

What's red and has 7 dents? Snow White's cherry.

What do you do when a baby starts to cry?

You use more lube.

What’s the best part about sex with 28-year-olds?

There are twenty of them.

6 looks like someone facing up.

9 looks like someone facing down.

69 looks like 2 people sucking each other's dicks.

"Giggety, giggety." Lois, give me your titties.

Little Johnny stooped down to lick my balls and deep dick my throbbing knob.

A child has diarrhea and asked his mom for a Viagra. "Why in the world do you want that?" she asked him. He looks at her and says, "Well, that's what you gift dad when his shit won't get hard."

What is a glory hole at the adult bookstore used for?

campaign contribution to the Republican Party.

Tits are like Lego bricks. They're there for the kid, but dad ends up playing with them.

What is a glory hole at the adult book store used for?

Campaign contributions to the Republican Party.

Father and mother are making love in the bedroom. Mother is on top of father. Suddenly, the son enters the bedroom. Everyone is embarrassed, of course.

The next morning, the mother takes the little boy aside and says, "I'll tell you about what you saw yesterday. You know, Dad has a big belly, and that's why Mom sometimes sits on top of that belly to push it flat." The little boy says, "But Mama, that does not make any difference." "Oh no?" the mom asks. "No," says the little boy, "When you go to work, the neighbor comes, and she puts herself on her knees for Dad, and she blows his belly up again!"