Newest Accident Jokes - Page 12

I would like to dedicate this song to a friend of mine, who was run over last week and is in hospital.

The wheels on the bus go round and round!

When you put the chicken in the oven and it goes down and the oven explodes oven and smoke and everything is fire and on fire and flies to the grass and all goes back

I hit something when i pulled into my driveway. and then i noticed that my cat was missing.

A little boy and a little girl were taking a bath. The little girl looked down and said, "What's that?" "That's my little red sports car," said the little boy. The little boy looked down and said, "What's that?" "That's my little red sports car garage," said the little girl. A few seconds later the little girl said, "How about you put your little red sports car in my little red sports car garage?" "Sure," said the little boy. The little boy's mother was down stairs and heard this blood curdling scream. She ran upstairs. Once she got there she saw blood all over the bathtub. "What happened?!" she said. "Well, Johnny tried to put his little red sports car in my little red sports car garage...but it didn't fit...so I cut the back wheels off..."

1 2 3 4 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!

One day a father went out for some cold beer and threw the 18 pack in the back seat on top of the infant in the car seat. Fortunately it was light beer.

so i was asleep and woke up and went to work my wife left already to her job i was driving my car and ran over someone i woke up in my bed realized it was all a dream 20 minutes later i got a phone call the my wife got hit bye a car

I crashed into those motherfuckers 😂😂😂

My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side so i crashed the car.

Why did the orphan cross the road. Because they thought they saw there parents(plot twist the orphan got ran over)

Today sucked my freind fell of a cliff and I went to jail

This 15 year old girl wanted a cross on her room with a long nail on the end over her bed unfortunately it killed her dad because it fell off the wall

(Do you get the joke)

(Her dad was on her and it fell and killed him)

When your parents say we are sorry that you are here what do you think of that. I THINK THAT YOUR AN ACCIDENT!

I’ll never forget my father’s last words...

Oh fuck, it’s a bus!

I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire today. Now they call him Hot Wheels.

I was making vegetable soup yesterday but the wheelchair wouldn’t fit

How did Hellen Keller lose her arm? She tried to read the stop sign at 100 MPH

What happens to a baby when you let it run loose it can’t cause it can’t run yet

There was a fire at my high school when I was in Year 7 - When the local newspaper interviewed my teacher, they asked her how she was seeing the 'bright side' of it. She said "Well, at least our new students got a warm welcome" 54 students died that day.