Absence jokes
While fucking, my sister said, "Brother, you are so naughty! You fucked our elder aunt every day in the absence of my uncle and cousins and made her pregnant!" Little did she know, I fucked our mother every day in the absence of her, my father, and my elder brother and made my mom pregnant as well!
Why did Bob fall off the swing while playing? Because he had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
Not Bob.
What does the "f" stand for in orphan?
Family.
Why can't an orphan go on a field trip? They don't have a parent's signature.
Why do orphans hate knock knock jokes?
Because there is never anyone at the door.
Where does an orphan come from?
Daddy getting milk.
What do you call a cow with no legs? (Ground Beef!) No, a cow! The absence of legs does not change the fact that the species is still a cow!
What do you call a DOG with no legs? (A dog?) It doesn't matter what you call it, as it's never going to come.
I once told an orphan his dad is Spider-Man because he is far from home.
Why do orphans use water for their cereal?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
When you're the only one bullying the weird kid and you're absent on the day he shoots up the school. ̄\_(ツ)_/ ̄
Once my dad left to get milk, then I realized we own a cow.
Your hairline goes back to when your dad left you.
God: You're gonna have 2 parents.
Orphan: Double it and give it to the next person.
What do orphans call family pictures?
A selfie.
Why was the orphan so successful?
Because people always said, "Go big or go home," and he only had one option. 😂🤣
Why do orphans always have water with their cereal?
Their dad never came back with the milk!
Why does an orphan use water for his cereal?
He is waiting for his dad with the milk.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
A little girl was sitting with some other kids. She thought to herself, "I want to have kids when I'm older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!" 🤣😂
What's the difference between a dad and the Twin Towers? The Twin Towers went black and never came back, and the dad was black and just didn't come back.