Worst Jokes Ever
Some marriages can make short people look like Shaquille O'Neal.
My friend that used to be married was making jokes about me being short. Then I told him, "Your marriage was so short it made me look like Shaquille O'Neal."
Your mama is so ugly, she walked by a TV and missed eight episodes.
Ever heard of candies? Candies balls fit in your mouth.
I used to be a fan, but after seeing her OnlyFans account, I'm a whole air conditioner.
Your mama is so ugly even Dora can't explore her.
A man is being sued for raping a deaf girl. The judge, showing his pinky:
"You should be ashamed, man, your conscience is even smaller than that!"
The girl, showing her arm:
"Mhhhmmhmm, mhhmhm!"
P1: What's the difference between a kid and a hooker?
P2: I don't know.
P1: Wow, you sick fuck!
Why can’t orphans have sex?
Because they don’t have a daddy to run back to.
Your forehead is so big you can smoke a cigar in the rain.
What's the only thing with 4 legs Asians don't eat? A table.
Your forehead is so big, even Galactus says, "Wow, that's big!"
What do you call a one-legged Asian?
Tie Won Shoo.
Your forehead is so big that it couldn’t handle an acute angle.
What's the difference between a violinist and a dog?
The dog knows when to stop scratching.
Doctor: I’m so sorry, sir, but you only have a couple months left.
The sir: My children will be devastated.
Doctor: But I have a shot that can change that.
The sir: Whatever it takes.
*Suppressed gunshots*
I like the satisfying sounds of your butt being spanked.
What do you call a dwarf that fell into a cement mixer?
A wee hard man.
Why can orphans get away with being bad at school?
They do not have parents to bring to parent/teacher conferences.
The "F" in "Orphan" stands for "Famulu."