Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the nut go to the bank?
To cashew its check.
Why didn’t the pecan go to the ballet?
It was afraid of the nutcracker.
Why did the boy leave his chestnuts in the rain?
He wanted them rusted.
What competition do nuts participate in?
The peanut butter cup.
What do elephants drink on vacation?
Peanut coladas.
Which nut is the best at playing tag?
Catch-yous, aka cashews.
Where do nuts go for a quick energy boost? The nearest Shell station.
Which nut is the worst for your diet?
Donuts.
How did the nut study for its test?
It used the inter-nut.
What’s a nut’s favorite scary movie?
The Creature from the Black Legume.
What did one nut say to the other?
“Cashew later.”
Why did the elephant cross the road?
To get to the peanut.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Peanut. Peanut who? Peanut butter open the door!
What is a cowboy’s favorite tree?
A horse chestnut tree.
Which type of nut goes to outer space?
An astro-nut.
Which nut is worth the most? A cashew.
Who named their daughter Macadamia?
A couple of nuts.
Your momma is so fat, she was in a movie and the screen broke!
The fish do nothing. That is definitely a bad joke.
My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair and guess who came crawling back!