Someone asked me what the lines on my wrist were from. I answered, "My cat has OCD."
Worst Jokes Ever
I usually don’t make school shooting jokes.
Because they’re aimed at a younger audience.
Dang... if I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put D IN U ;)
I only know there are 25 letters in the alphabet, I don't know Y.
(Me: How many letters are in the alphabet?) -- (Friend: 11- T-H-E-- A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T)
(Me: There are 20 letters in the alphabet, right?) -- (Crush: No, there is actually 26.) -- (Me: oooOoh, I forgot u r a qt! So its acdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz?) -- (Crush: You forgot the D) -- (Me: That's not needed yet ;])
What letter is really hot? T
C = cOCK O = CoCK C = COcK K = COCk COCK = cock cock = COCK
ME SExUAL SRrY LoL
"CoComelon meme,
No matter how fast I run, I can't escape my problems - OULEH...
Nobody loves me .v."
Deez nutz!
What is the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can't hear an enzyme.
Q: Why can't orphans be gay?
A: Because they don't have anyone they can call "Daddy."
Q: Why doesn't Jesus play hockey?
A: He hates getting nailed to the boards.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
Why do orphans love school?
'Cause people actually come back.
I was naughty at school and my teacher said she's going to tell my dad. I was like, "Who's that?"
What do you get when King Kong steps on Batman and Robin?
Flatman and Ribbon.
Nancy be like, "Don't do drugs, do cock!"
I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. Why? I don't know Y.
Your momma's so fat, when I went to suck her titties, I got a mouth full of knee.
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
When the moon hits the earth,
IT Moon-chan kissing Earth-chan.
Hope the towers are doing well this morning, and I'll get back to you!
Why are the towers working out? They have big thighs!
