Worst Jokes Ever
Yeah man! Life is wonderful! But, when you realize all of the ones you loved were fake.
And when you die, does your online friends notice? How will they notice? Or will they ever notice? Is 13 age too young for dying? Am I just paranoid? I'm scared.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy".
What is the difference between a puppy and a fork?
I don’t microwave forks.
Charger: Yo, Phone.
Phone: Yeah?
Charger: Can I plug all in you?
Phone: Ayooo!
My wife and I watched The Perfect Murder together. Excellent movie, but what disturbed me though was my wife constantly taking notes.
Yo dad's so stupid, he came back after he got the milk.
Why don't orphans play GTA?
Because they're sad they don't get wanted!
Why did the kid drop his ice cream?
He got hit by a bus.
- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop.
- Right. So you weigh yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.
- Oh...that might actually be even easier.
What’s the difference between a priest and target?
Nothing, they both have children’s pants half off.
No one is smart. I am smart.
HAIKU JOKE:
Helen Keller could Fuck a blind man so hard that she Ends up with his child.
What is an orphan's family reunion called?
Me time.
Welcome to Plastic Surgery Anonymous. Nice to see so many new faces.
What do Myspace and my dad have in common?
I haven't seen them in a while.
What do an Olympic silver medalist and a Catholic priest have in common?
A: They both come in a little behind.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple? Apples get picked.
A pregnant wife and her husband were in a hospital as she was in labor. The doctor suggested using a machine that transfers the birth pains from the mother to the father. They agree, so the machine is used. 40%, the husband feels nothing, 70% still not feeling anything, 100%, nothing.
The doctor says it must be broken. When the pair return home, the milkman is dead in the front yard.
Want to know what I do in my freetime?
Punch an orphan, cuz what are they going to do, tell their mom?
How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.