You're

You're jokes

Interview

  • Interviewer: What are your strengths?

    Interviewee: I fall in love easily.

    Interviewer: And your weaknesses?

    Interviewee: Those beautiful green eyes of yours...

    Teacher

  • My teacher asked the class to stand up if you're dumb. No one did, so she said, "Come on, someone must be dumb," and pointed over to the left side of the classroom. Lil Jonny stands up. "Do you think you're dumb, Lil Jonny?" asked the teacher. "No, I just feel bad for you. You're the only one who stood up," replied Lil Jonny!

    Cereal

  • Don't you just hate when you have to eat cereal with water because your dad won't bring the fucking milk? Cause same.

    Cut

  • I went to an emo kid who just got a haircut, and instead of saying, "Like your cut, G," I slapped his arm and said, "I like your cuts, G."

    Wife

  • "I’m on a hunt for my wife’s murderer, have been for years."

    "Oh my God! Your wife’s been murdered?!"

    "No no, you misunderstand. I’m still looking for him."

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