Your mama so fat that when you were born, yo mama gave you carpet burn.
You Jokes
A high school student and his best friend were rushing to class after his best friend caused them both to be late. His best friend asked, "Would you like to hear a joke?" "Sure," he replied. "What do you and your sister have in common?" "I don't know." "Because of me you're both late for your next period."
Did you hear about the gay Indian who died?
He was a brave sucker.
You know why they call her Wonder Woman?
She's always wondering where she parked her invisible jet.
I went to the local butcher's and asked him what happened to his Saturday boy. The butcher replies, "I had to fire him, I found him with his dick in the meat slicer!"
"What did you do with the meat slicer?" I asked.
The butcher says, "I had to fire her too!"
Alternative punchline:
"I had to call social services, she was only 14."
I walk in on my mum and she's in the middle of pulling off my dad's boxers. I said, "Mum, you really spoil those dogs!"
What's the difference between a watermelon and an orphan?
One you cut into 2 with a knife.
And the watermelon you cut into pieces.
How do you get an orphan sad?
You say you will tell their mom that they have been a baaaaaad boy.
What do you call an Indian gravedigger?
Digdeep.
Roses are dead, violets smell like poo, I got a big fucking shotgun, what you gonna do?
Orphan: Let's play baseball!
Girl: No, you can't.
Orphan: Why?
Girl: Because you can't find home.
You: I want my mama.
Me: Soz, you can't even get one.
What do you call a Turk eating turkey?
A cannibal.
Why are hindustan bhai so good at Python?
When they are hungry, they use Python and take credit card information ;). You know what they say, you give a man a curry and he eats for a day, you give a man a language and he eats for a lifetime.
Last week, I was on a plane to Manchester when suddenly the plane was hit by a ball. I wondered where it came from, but I soon realized it was none other than Penaldo practicing his free kicks. Shame on you, Penaldo, for almost killing me!
Grandpa: "Sonny, let me tell you something. There's only one damn thing in this whole world worse than Alzheimer's."
Boy: "What's that?"
Grandpa: "What's what?"
Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into 2 skyscrapers.
How do you give a redneck a circumcision? Kick his sister in the jaw.
What did the blender say to the orange juice?
"What the fuck are you, you are so fucking stupid, shut the fuck up."
You: What do you call a door knob without the lock?
Me: I don't know.
You: Are you sure?
Me: I don't know.
You: Okay.
