You jokes
I constantly wonder how people can live happily ever after, but then I realized that antidepressants don't make you OD.
"Ugly kid, I feel ugly."
"Me? You don't have feel ugly, you already ugly."
A man walks into a magic forest, when he stumbles upon a talking tree and tries to cut it down. The tree says, "You can't cut me down, I'm a talking tree!" The man replies, "You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue."
Three friends go to a water park and meet a genie. "You each get one wish." "When you get to the top of the slide, you shall scream your wish as you go down." The first man went down the slide and screamed "Coca Cola," and the pool was filled with Coca-Cola.
The next ugly-ass looking mf goes down the slide and screams "C-M&Ms" as if he wasn’t just about to say cum—then the pool was full of cu—I mean M&Ms. The last horny-ass bitch is so excited he says "Weee!" Then the pool is full of piss. He was upset the pool wasn’t full of dildos./j
What do you call an orphan if every other orphan gets picked?
Someone: Ugly?
Me: No, trick question, they are still an orphan.
You know how all zodiacs have hairstyles... well not Cancers.
Do you know why pedos get away with molesting orphans? Who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
Did you know emo kids are the highest jumpers in the world? Some are still up there!
What do Call of Duty players say when they shoot up a school?
654-721-8940
(If you understand the joke, you're a god.)
Why can't you run through a campground?
Because it's "past tents!"
You look like the 0.01 percent of bacteria the Lysol didn't kill.
You look like the 0.01 percent of germs the Lysol didn't kill.
Were you born on the highway? 'Cause that's where most accidents happen.
You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?
Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope.
Your forehead is so big, you can fit Santa’s sack on it.
What kind of trumpet are you playing?
An "Donald Trumpet"!
How do you enter your house?
Through Bill Gates!
What kind of mask are you wearing?
An Elon Musk!
Yo momma's so gay, you sucked her balls.