You jokes

What do you call my friends?...

Short.

"Hola, soy Dora. Do you see the cliff? Say, "backpack." Tell her that we need Amanda. While I push her off the cliff, you will not peek. Did you just peek? Close your eyes, you silly goose." The end.

"Hola soy Dora, do you see Donald Trump? That’s right, he’s at my house, and he’s building a wall to separate me and Caillou. And Mami won’t let him, so she was walled alive!"

So the other day, I saw a child in a wheelchair.

He was getting bullied a lot, so I came up and said, "Why don't you stand up to those bullies?"

Why do you stink?

Because you haven't showered, tu, perro.

What's the best comeback for a person calling you an orphan?

Kill their parents.

What do you call an orphan that grows up to be a priest?

Father-less.

If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on the planet.

You are like a software update. Whenever I see you, I immediately think, "Not now."

I’d give you a nasty look, but you already have one, bummer!

I thought of you today, and it reminded me to take out the trash.

Those rape alarms give you a headache, don't they?

What do you call an IT teacher who touches up his students?

A PDF file.

What do you call a fudge packer who has special needs?

A gay black male that has Down Syndrome.

You ever notice that the USA could be a part of Russia?

RUSSIA US A

Hey Siri, what’s in my bank account?

You stupid shit, piece of elephant crap, you’re so ugly that when you were born, your nickname was bastard! You’re so ugly, that your crush fainted in front of you and was proclaimed dead! You’re so ugly that-

(Destroys phone cutely)

If emo grass cuts itself for you, then what do transgender picture frames do?

I rate you 9 out of 10, because I'm the 1 you need.

What do you think was going through the heads of the 9/11 victims on floor 43?

Floor 44.

If you jump off a building and yell "parkour," how can they tell that it was intentional? T'was a failed stunt.