You Jokes

Blonde

How do you put "blonde" and "duh" in the same sentence? Just say, "Blondes are dumb."

Road

You're walking on the street when you realize that you're in the road as you feel the horn dying away.

Water Bottle

The twin towers are like water bottles.

It's all right if you knock them down as long as you pick up the mess.

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  • Orphan

    I would create an orphan website...

    But you need a home page to do that.

    (Since somebody stole this joke before) 🤷‍♀️

    Website

    I have a really good joke.

    Do you want to hear it?

    Oh wait, this is a bad joke website.

    Dog

    I smell up dog in here.

    "What's up, dog?"

    Nothing much, how about you?

    Tin Can

    Did you hear about the song Rihanna wrote about the tin can?

    It was called "S & N."

    Food

    Hello, I'm hahaha. What do you call a funny rubber toe?

    Roberto!!~!~!!! AaaaAQAAAHAHAHAA. And like hahaha, what's wrong with airline food? They're not black and they're not people.

    Shadow

    what do you call a shadow stalker REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

    Kidnapping

    A guy walks with a young boy into the woods. The boy turns to him and says, “Hey mister, it’s getting really dark and I’m scared.” The man replies, “How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone.”

    Difference

    Him: What's the difference between Incestry.com and Ancestry.com?

    Her: What?

    Him: Nothing, either way you will be dating your cousin.

    Shower

    A few male neighbors came over to the house to take a shower because, for some reason, their house didn't have water.

    A few minutes later, I walk into the shower. I see the male neighbors and Mom taking a shower together. Then I said, "What are you doing?" They all say, "We're taking a shower together so we could save water."

    Cow

    What do you call a cow that was hit by an anvil? A flat iron steak.

    Nun

    Three nuns are talking, and the first nun says, "You would never believe what I discovered." Intrigued, the others signal her to continue. "I found a phone in the priest's room," said the first nun. "Oh, that's nothing," said the second one. "I found condoms in one of his drawers." said the second one. "What did you do with them?" said the first nun. Pridefully, the second nun responds with, "I poked holes in all of them." and the third nun says, "Oh sh*t...."