Worst

Worst jokes

Fart

  • I entered Kian's house. At the top of the stair, I was greeted by my greatest fantasy, JOHN. He said in a manly tone, "Hello there." I walked slowly up the stairs and greeted him back. As I walked past his room, I felt uneasy. I walked into Kian's room to find no one. I turned around and gasped. John is standing there, a bulge had appeared and poked me as he got nearer. He pushed me onto Kian's bed. The bed was that bad it broke as I fell onto it. John says, "A broken bed is nothing to worry about." I look up at him in disbelief, he's more masculine than I thought. He thrust himself onto me, his crotch area sticky to the touch. He then ripped a fart as he bent over, at this point I knew it was too late John, the fart he ripped (sticky to the touch) had me so in shock I wasn't ready for what was next, he picked and jumped on my head ripping the most monstrous, enormous, deadly, sticky to the touch fart I'd ever seen, it knocked me out. I awoke to find I was in the WALLS. I looked out to find I was in the glory hole, my worst nightmare had become reality, I fully understood my purpose in life was to the holy glory hole, I heard "GRANDAD CAN I GET SOME V-BUCK" I then knew I was in for some Kian treats.

    The end

  • 0
  • WW2

  • What's the worst thing to happen to a Japanese person in WW2... being drafted as a kamikaze pilot, or existing with a Fat Man or Little Boy?

  • 2
  • Mom

  • Son: Daddy?

    Dad: Why tf do you keep calling me daddy? You're 11 years old, feminine gay hoe.

    Son: Whoa!? Daddy, what's that?

    Dad: Wtf are you talking about?

    Son: Your dick has gotten more tastier?

    Son: Ooh... I..... Just.... Wanna.... Sssuuc

    Dad: Oh nope, I'm not having a gay hoe's fiend in my house, no quit looking at my dick, you need some pussy.

    Son: eeeeeewwwwwwwwwww nooooo plz no plz

    Dad: Shut the fuck up: ehr em

    Mom: What the fugde is going on?

    Dad: Our son's a gay bitch.

    Mom: Language! So? I need to teach him how to like a girl huh?

    Dad: Yes Ma'am, plz.

    Mom: Okay. Herman, get your gay ass in my bed but naked, I'll be there in 10.

    Son: wha whey huh ur gonna... wtf?!?!?!??

    Mom: Quit cursing, I'm gonna fuck u extra hard!!

    Son: Ewww, I'm gonna fuck my mom even though she is hot sexy but eeewwww.

    Mom: Shut it!!!, or I'm gonna recordid and *fliped her hair taking off her panies (pussy naked)* and show this to ur gay fuck friends!

    Son: Huh

    Son: Mom FUCK U*

    Mom: Okay baby I'm gonna fuck u in a minute lemme tak my bra off

    Son: UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH

    Son: Moms are the worst, are they?

    Me no there not sometimes but i love them teheheteheh

  • 3
  • Memory

  • It's sad when the person that gave you memories becomes a memory.

    You know one of the worst feelings ever to exist?

    When your parents and friends all still see the happy little kid you used to be...

    ...but in reality, that kid has been long gone for years. (not my words)

    Motorcycle

  • So a guy gets a motorcycle with authentic leather seats, and the dealer tells him, "Dude, the rain will ruin the seats. Get it under something if it starts raining, and worst-case scenario, put Vaseline all over the seats to make it waterproof." So he goes to his girlfriend's house that night for dinner, and before he goes inside, she says, "Listen, this is your first time meeting my parents. We have a rule: the first one to speak has to do the dishes." So he walks inside and sees a mountain of dishes, over three months' worth, because no one has spoken, and the stench is awful.

    During dinner, he concocted a plan to get someone to speak, so he started doing all of this crazy shit to try and get someone to speak. Not a peep. Eventually, he grabs his girlfriend, bends her over, and starts going to town. Still nothing. The parents are outraged but not speaking because they don't want to do the dishes. After about a minute of this, he walks away and does the same to her mum and starts going to town. Now the dad is pissed and just staring him down with daggers. At that moment, it starts to rain. He remembers his motorcycle is out in the rain, and he grabs the Vaseline out of his pack pocket, and the dad goes, "FINE! I'LL DO THE DISHES!"

  • 0
  • Bomb

  • What is the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl?

    You need to drop the bomb twice on her before she gets it.

  • 1
  • Orphan

  • Technoblade: I'm the second worst thing to ever happen to those orphans.

    Quackity: What is the first thing to ever happen to the orphans???

    Technoblade: Quackity..... they're orphans.

    (Disclaimer: not funny xD)

  • 3
  • Cancer

  • You know what's the worst about having a daughter with cancer?

    You can't pull her hair when you hit it from the back.

  • 1