Worse

Worse jokes

Funeral

My friend was pissed off with me. I was sniffing his sister's knickers. It was worse that they were still on her. It was worse the family were there. It made the rest of her funeral really awkward.

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  • Depression

    I saw this one quote: "The people who smile the most are covering the most pain." I think this is true, just not with everyone. As I am really depressed and act like myself with my friends, but with my parents and family, I force a smile so they don't worry more than they do.

    I did a test for my therapy session to see what level of depression I had. It came back with severe, 22/24, but I asked her to tell my mum it came back as moderate, saying I would tell her that my depression got worse. She went along with it, but I haven't told my mum and I now make things sound like I aren't as messed up as I truly am to my therapist.

    Santa Claus

    What is worse to have - a dead baby or a dead Santa Claus?

    Santa. You need extra freezers for reindeer.

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  • Baby

    What is worse than a baby getting hanged in a tree?

    That same baby getting hanged in multiple trees.

    Worm

    What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

    Finding only half a worm.

    Baby

    What is worse than 16 babies in 16 dumpsters? One baby in 16 dumpsters.

    Baby

    What's worse than 1000 dead babies hanging off a tree?

    1 dead baby hanging off 1000 trees.

    Baby

    What's worse than ten babies nailed to one tree?

    One baby nailed to ten trees.

    Grandpa

    Grandpa: "Sonny, let me tell you something. There's only one damn thing in this whole world worse than Alzheimer's."

    Boy: "What's that?"

    Grandpa: "What's what?"

    Rape

    What's worse than getting raped in a cemetery? Finding someone else's semen in your mom's corpse.

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  • Oyster

    What's worse than sucking a dozen raw oysters out of your grandmother's cunt?

    Putting in 12 and sucking out 13.

    Oyster

    What's worse than eating 5 raw oysters out of your grandmother's vagina?

    Realizing you only put in 4.

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  • Friend

    What's the worst thing about having a Congolese friend?

    He always needs a hand.

    Degree

    What's worse than having an honorary degree from Harvard? Being homeless and having an honorary degree from Harvard.

    Sister

    Q: What’s worse than fingerbanging your sister?

    A: Finding your dad's wedding ring.

    Baby

    Okay not a depression joke but... what’s worse than 10 babies in 1 bucket?

    1 baby in 10 buckets.

    Baby

    What is worse than a baby spinning at a hundred miles per hour on a washing line?

    Hitting it off with a cricket bat.