Wife

Artemas

Three men are outside Heaven’s gates waiting to be go to through Heaven. The angel at the gate tells them “Depending on the length of time and your faithfulness to your last partner decides your way across the bridge to Heaven”.

The first guy says “I was with my wife for 5 years and cheated 3 times”. The angel gives him an old model pick up, the second guy says “11 years and only once” and is granted a Mercedes.

The last man says “20 years and not once , I loved her with all my heart” and with the angel impressed he gets a gold edition Lamborghini and sets off ahead of the other two men. Hours later the two men catch up to him crying behind the wheel and one says " I know we are dead but it could be much worse".

The guy looks up and says “How! I just went past my wife on a skateboard”

Baby

Daloolah

Whats worse than five dead babies in one garbage can?

  • 1 dead baby in 5 garbage cans.
1

Depression

Anonymous

So I meet with a therapist on a weekly basis, we talk about my depression and how it’s been getting worse. Recently, I’ve been advised about my condition, and how I’ve been discussing to her about being suicidal, she’s been very helpful throughout it, I was even told I can pay in advance from now on, so I don’t have to worry about it later.

Offensive

Anonymous

What’s worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? 1 baby, nailed to 10 trees.

Woman

Anonymous

Since it started raining, all my wife has done is look sadly through the stupid window…

If it gets any worse, I’ll have to let her in.

4

Baby

Joyboy

What’s worse than 3 babies in one trashcan? One baby in three trashcans.

Russia

Anonymous

Russian history in 5 words: “And then things got worse.”

Baby

He must never know

What is worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. What’s worse than that? The one at the bottom is still alive. What is worse still? It has to eat its way out. What’s worse than that? It went back for seconds.

5

Car

Anonymous

What’s worse than locking your keyes in the car in front of an abortion clinic?

Having to go back inside and ask to borrow a hanger.

Doctor

Anonymous

Doctor: I have good news and I have worse news Patient: Well what’s the bad news Doctor: You have one day left to live Patient: What news could possibly be worse Doctor: I’ve been trying to contact you sense yesterday

4

Dad

Anonymous

I don’t know what’s worse: Finding bucket loads of porn on my dad’s laptop, or finding out he was in all of them

5

Sally

Cetraflux

Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!

What’s worse than Sally in a trash can? Sally in thirteen trash cans.

0

Nonce

BaldeyLocks

Whats worse than having ants in your pants?

Uncles.

Baby

What’s worse than ten baby’s nailed to one tree?

One baby nailed to ten trees.

America

Judas

What was the Worse Purchase America ever made?

Spending Billions on Two Rice Cookers in 1945

Baby

Anonymous

What is worse to have - a dead baby or dead Santa Claus? Santa. You need extra freezers for reindeer.

Baby

Dead baby Pile

What’s worse than a dead baby?- A pile of dead babies- whats worse than that? -The one on the bottom is alive.- And whats worst than that is, the baby has to eat it’s way out

Baby

Silent

What’s worse then a baby in a trash can?

A baby in 10 trash cans.

4

Baby

Anonymous

What is worse than 16 babies in 16 dumpsters? One baby in 16 dumpsters.

Baby

definetlygoingtohell

What’s worse than ten babies on one tree? One baby on ten trees.