Worse jokes
Three men are outside Heaven's gates waiting to go through Heaven. The angel at the gate tells them, "Depending on the length of time and your faithfulness to your last partner decides your way across the bridge to Heaven."
The first guy says, "I was with my wife for 5 years and cheated 3 times." The angel gives him an old model pick up. The second guy says, "11 years and only once," and is granted a Mercedes.
The last man says, "20 years and not once. I loved her with all my heart," and with the angel impressed, he gets a gold edition Lamborghini and sets off ahead of the other two men. Hours later, the two men catch up to him crying behind the wheel and one says, "I know we are dead, but it could be much worse."
The guy looks up and says, "How! I just went past my wife on a skateboard!"
Russia is worse than the USSR.
Russia is just a bonerless USSR.
What’s worse than banging your sister?
Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.
Roses are red, violets are blue, a face like yours belongs in a place worse than a zoo.
What’s worse than getting a job at McDonald’s?
Not getting the job at McDonald’s.
What's worse than having a comedian as president? Having a president that has dementia.
What's worse than a failed suicide, you ask?
I fail suicide because you forgot to do the dishes and your parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you, not yourself.
I'd say you were the spawn of Satan, but that would be an insult to Satan.
What’s worse than running with scissors?
Scissoring with the runs!
What is worse than a dead baby in a trash can?
100 dead babies in a trash can.
What is worse than that?
There's a live one at the bottom.
What is worse than that?
It eats its way out.
What is worse than that?
It comes back for seconds.
Q: What's worse than f**king a 2 year old?
A: Wiping the blood off of your clown suit afterwards.
What's worse than 5 babies in a dumpster?
5 dumpsters in a baby.
What did the Joker say to Harley Quinn?
Nothing.
What is worse than seeing your sibling drown?
Getting the water bill.
What's worse than finding one dead baby in a bin? Finding one dead baby in five bins.
How do you know if your sister's on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes funny.
What's worse than fingering your sister?
Finding your dad's wedding ring inside her.
What's worse than 10 babies in a truck?
One baby in 10 trucks.
Q: What’s worse than fingerbanging your sister?
A: Finding your dad's wedding ring.
What's worse than 3 babies in one trashcan?
One baby in three trashcans.
What’s the difference between me and cancer?
My dad didn’t beat cancer.