Why can't an emo person be in charge of sky diving?
He won't deploy the parachute.
Wont Jokes
I'm making a website for orphans. [I] won't add the home page.
Sell PC.
Go to Croatia.
Try to fly to the US to meet female.
US won't let me in.
End up in Norway.
Female leaves me.
Female gets arrested by feds.
Feds read all my messages and see my dick pics.
Just another day in the defib life.
Why can't orphans have a funeral? Because their parents won't be there.
What's the difference between family and cats...
Cats won't abuse you at Christmas.
One time, little Johnny was watching TikTok, and he saw a toy that he wanted so badly, so he cleaned up the whole house and did his homework. When he was done, he saw a spill on the table. He went to the sink to grab a cloth, but when he came back, it was gone. He went to his mom's room and saw a drink with the label "daddy's drink," so he drunk it and said, "It's daddy's; he won't mind," and all day he was like the Flash. So he went back, turned the bottle around, and it said "Speedy," and then he said, "Oh, great heavens!"
Once I sucked my mum's titties. Most adopted people won't know about that.
A man went to a library and asked the librarian if they had any books on suicide.
She replied "Oh fuck off, you won't bring it back!"
Why do cat orphans watch sci-fi movies?
Because they won't understand what the mother ship is.
Yo mama is so fat that she stepped on the scale and it says, "Hey fat b****, break your fat a** in half so you won't weigh as much!"
Seems very long. You won't remember the telephone number...
I remember it like this from school days in Ireland.
Dolly Parton is shopping for a new bra. A lady says, "Your size is 69." Dolly says, "No way, that's too too too (222) big." So she goes to the doctor. "Doc, I need something to make my boobs smaller." "Here, take (51) pills for 6 days (x6)," and so she did. Days later, she ran back to the doc, "Jesus Christ doctor, look what happened. I'm BOOBLESS!" 55378008 upside down.
Why can't emos come out of the closet to their parents?
Because they won't be there to stick around.
You wanna hear an Indian egg joke? (yeah-)
Never mind. You won't understand.
My mum said not to walk the streets because I won't find home the next day. I was an orphan.
FICTIONAL BOOKS / AUTHORS
Why Should I Walk? By Iona Carr.
What Lonely Girls Should Do By Seymour Fellowes.
Unusual Window Decorations By Rod Curtains.
The Long Walk Home By Misty Bus.
Race to the Outhouse By Willie Makit and Illustrated by Betty Wont.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they won't know where home plate is.
"Hey, look at me, I'm stupid named Jordan C who won't shut up and leave Addison alone."
What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?
Kids won't eat the broccoli.
Me: Sister, stop stealing my stuff or I will make you feel bad.
Sister: No, I won't stop.
Me: Fine, I'm telling the world what you did.
Sister: What? You will see when I post it.
Sister: WHY DID YOU TELL THEM I PEED ON SANTA CLAUS WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD?
Me: BECAUSE YOU DON ́T HAVE A LIFE.
What don't Rick Astley and the Twin Towers have in common?
One won't let you down, while the other will.
