Wonder jokes

You're so wonderful that Wonderland booked tickets to meet you!

Stories like Rudolph and Wonder show that different means worse.

Your mum is so fat, when she roleplayed Wonder Woman, she couldn't fit in the invisible jet.

I wonder if Stephen Hawking was an organ donor, because I need new parts for my go-kart.

Have you ever wondered why orphans hate milk?

'Cause their dad never came back with it.

I constantly wonder how people can live happily ever after, but then I realized that antidepressants don't make you OD.

There used to be Wonder Woman.

Now we wonder, what is a woman?

I wrote a book called "Endless Love."

It’s about a tennis match between Stevie Wonder and Hellen Keller.

"Jesus loves you" is a wonderful thing to hear in church.

But a horrible thing to hear in a Mexican prison.

One spelling mistake can completely ruin your marriage.

I accidentally texted my wife, "I’m having a wonderful time. I wish you were her."

I wonder if Kobe Bryant enjoyed his last flight.

So I was just chilling in the World Trade Center, and I got airplane Wi-Fi. I wonder why....

Adam and Eve are wondering whether they are black or white. Eve says, "Why don't you go and ask God?"

So Adam goes into the Garden of Eden and shouts out to God, "Are we black or white?" A big booming voice bellows out, "You are what you are."

He immediately goes back to Eve and tells her that they are white. "How do you know?" asks Eve. "Because he said, 'You are what you are,'" Adam replied. "Why does that mean we are white?" asked Eve. "Because if we were black, He would have said, 'You is what you is.'"

You wonder and you wonder. Grandma said you better go to bed now. Tell your dad and grandpa, and your dad and your mom.

If an orange is called an orange, why isn’t a lemon called a yellow?

So, my friend's birthday is in a couple of days, and I was wondering what to get him.

He hangs out at my house a lot, so I suggested adoption papers.

So a lady was walking down the street with two bags, and one of the bags was leaking $100 bills. A cop pulls up and he says, “Ma’am, ma’am, your bag is leaking hundred dollar bills.” Then she says, “Oh, thank you. I wonder how long that’s been going on.” And the cop says, “Before I help you, may I ask why your bag is leaking $100 bills?” And the lady says, “OK, I’ll tell you. So I live next to a stadium, and I have this beautiful rose garden, but these dumb teenagers always try and pee on the rosebushes. So they stick their junk through the fence, and I grab their junk. I said, ‘$100 dollars or it’s coming off.’” The cop says, “Oh, OK, well what’s the other bag for?” And she says, “Well, not all of them want to give me $100.”

Do you ever wonder why orphans buy small cereal boxes? It's because they can't get family size.

You know why they call her Wonder Woman?

She's always wondering where she parked her invisible jet.

Stevie Wonder is a terrible father.

He never sees his kids.