Why does OSHA require women to wear panties?
Because every manhole needs a cover.
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
I was in the corner shop to buy some lottery tickets, and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
My 19-year-old girl killed a butterfly. I said no butter for you.
She then she killed a cockroach. I told her nice try.
My woman is a nine on a bad day, but she’ll be 10 on her birthday.
I like my women how I like my scotch: 11 years old and mixed with Coke.
Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.
Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?
Woman: Two, I want a man is is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.
Man: Shit!
There’s 4 billion women on earth Why isn’t it clean yet?
Emma Watson gets hotter and hotter in the Harry Potter movies when you’re watching in reverse order.
Why can't a Muslim woman give head to an American cop?
She doesn't eat pigs.
How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
Bill Clinton and Joe Biden are on a sinking ship.
Joe Biden says we need to save the women and children. Bill Clinton says, "Screw the women and children." Joe Biden says, "Do we have that much time?"
A Thai woman ran into a wall. What does she break?
Her boner.
What's the difference between women and men?
Men have rights.
A woman's age is harder to get than the President's phone number.
Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and George Washington are on a sinking ship.
As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: “Save the women!”
George W. Bush hysterically hollers: “Screw the women!”
Bill Clinton asks excitedly: “Do we have time?”
Three ladies were on a flight when suddenly the captain announced, "Please prepare for a crash landing."
The first lady put on all her jewelry. Surprised by this, the other ladies questioned her actions. The first lady replied, "Well, when they come to rescue us they will see that I am rich and will rescue me first." The second lady, not wanting to be left behind, began to take off her top and bra. "Why are you doing that?" the other ladies questioned. "Well, when they come to rescue us, they will see my great tits and will take me first." The third lady who was African, not wanting to be outdone, took off her pants and panties. "Why are you doing that?" the other ladies questioned. "Well, they always search for the black box first."
What's black, white, and red all over? A nun on her period.
Michael Jackson has done something no one has ever done before. I'm not talking about his record sales or tickets sold.
I'm talking about being born a black man and dying a white woman. Incredible!
A woman walks out of the bathroom, winks at her husband and says, “I shaved down there; you know what that means.”
The husband responds, “Yeah, the drain is clogged.”
