Wish jokes
Sometimes I wish my grass was depressed, then it would just cut itself.
A Make-A-Wish patient wanted to see Black Panther IRL, so I pulled his plug.
I, for one, wish Donald Trump was President again. It's been a while since we had a presidential assassination.
Timmy Turner: I wish the Vegan Teacher was a cheeseburger.
Wanda: Ok, Timmy.
Timmy: Cosmo, bring her to me!
Cosmo: Here you go, Timmy.
*Timmy eats Miss Kadie*
I wish I was dead like my jokes.
Quote of the day: It's never too late to be what you wished you were.
Hope y'all are having a great day! I just got back from a volleyball tournament that I had to be up at 5 AM for! We played three games and won the last one. We advanced and are playing a few more tomorrow. Wish me and my team good luck!
Emo chick: "I wish I could feel dead inside!"
The kid named Dead: "😄😄😄"
In 2023, I hope we all get wiped out like the dinosaurs.
I wish we were all aborted. <3
Farrah Fawcett, upon arriving at the pearly gates, God asked her, for having led such an honest life, to grant her one wish. Farrah simply requested that the children of the world would be safe.
Five hours later, Michael Jackson died.
An emo kid sees his clothes hanging to dry, and he says to his clothes, "I wish I were you!"
I was a sit-down comedian, then I tried to stand up. I fell.
I wished I stayed in the wheelchair.
Mama is so Catholic, Swiss cheese wishes it was as holy as she is. Do you...
Um, I need help. How should I deal with depression?
Joke: I wish my grass was emo, so it would cut itself.
An emo kid and a silent kid would be a good acquaintance because the emo would wish to die, and the silent kid would be the nice guy and grant that wish.
There are painkillers, but they only relieve physical pain. I wish something could relieve my internal pain.
A boy went to a genie and said, "I want to be like Batman."
He went home, his parents weren't there.
What is an orphan's least favorite holiday?
Christmas, they wish they'd get parents.
It was raining sadly all day. My wife, my two daughters, and me were stuck in the house when wife’s mom and dad just died.
Wife: 😭😭😭I wish this never happened.
Mia, our first daughter: Mommy, it’s ok. I love whenever I see you🥰🥰
Abby, our second daughter: I love you all. Only if you guys die I won’t, but I love you when you're alive 😉😏
Me, husband: What kind of nonsense was that? You love us when we’re alive, but you don’t love us when we’re dead🤥😥😓
Everyone except Abby: Abby, this is serious. Mommy’s mother and father died. Mia says: Yes, your mom is sadly down right now, you made her more sad😡🤬. Dad says: *sniffs* Abby, I had made a discussion. I will take you to an orphanage. I am sorry 😣 when I am better and happy and I forgot what you said then we’ll get you back. Mom says:
This was not a joke. I just did this for Love 💕
I wish my grass was emo so it would cut itself.