Why is a tree brown?
If you are thinking about this, you are racist.
Why Jokes
Why did Sally drown in the pool?
She had no arms, remember.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is...
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He ran out of WiFi.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the gay guy's house. Knock, knock. Who's there? Chicken.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is. Sorry for the dark joke :>
I was digging in my garden when I found a treasure chest full of gold. I was about to run inside and tell my wife, but then I remembered why I was digging in my garden.
A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders.
As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"
When I was walking home, a couple of married guys were saying, "Your mom is good at her job," but I realized my mom doesn't work.
So I ask my mom, "Why are these guys saying you're good at your job? You don't work." My mom said, "Yeah, I got a new job." So I said, "What do you do?" My mom said, "Job hand, no, I mean it's called a hand job."
"The rise of atheism is going to lead to a break down of social morals and lead to all kinds of filth, including an increase in child abuse," said the village priest.
The village scientists did some fact checking. In prison, they found roughly 70% of child abusers were hyper religious before committing the crimes, and another 20% converted to religions to look 'remorseful'. The remaining 10% preferred not to say. They presented the findings to the media.
"Scientists slander good religious folk and ignore the weight of evidence!"
"Is Science biased against religion? You decide in this survey," they reported.
The village priest is living at his majesty's convenience and tells the others he committed armed robbery.
"Why is this a joke? It's not even funny!" said the person reading this, breaking the forth wall.
What is funny is you got to the end of this post and didn't cringe. Why not?
Roses are red,
My nuts are bigger than your small balls, that's why I get all the bitches.
Why do orphans play Roblox? Because there is a game called "Adopt Me!"
Why did Stephen Hawking not believe in God?
Computers don’t really have a specific religion.
Why can’t orphans eat at a family restaurant? Because they don’t have a mom or dad.
Why do cows have big [udders]? Because they have big balls.
Q: Why can't orphans be gay?
A: Because they don't have anyone they can call "Daddy."
Why can't orphans play Monopoly?
Because they never get a full house.
Why did the cats go in the litterbox?? To take a poop!
Why can’t an emo have sex?
They can’t make it to the bed, they kept swinging on the tree.
Mom: Son, where are my condoms?
Son: What are condoms?
Dad: She puts it on me and the sandwich.
Son: Wait, why did my girlfriend come over and take one?
Dad: Um, I don't know, but go to bed.
Son: But it's 2:46pm in the afternoon, bruh.
