Why jokes
I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don't understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what's so sad?" and she said "What do you think was running through these kid's heads before they died?" I replied "probably a bullet". She gasped and said "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent's heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."
Why did Paul Walker cross the road?
Because he wasn’t wearing his seat belt.
Why did Timmy throw the clock out the window?
It reminded him of Arnold Clock, the man convicted of knife raping his wife.
Q: Why are orphans bad at baseball?
A: They can’t find home.
Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run too if your name was dgergbbfdnbj.
Why did the girl not eat her dinner?
because she has an eating disorder.
Why did Helen Keller's dog run away?
You'd run away too if your name was OAhHhPrhhHK.
Why can't dinosaurs talk?
Because they are all dead.
Why did Grampa pass out? Because of diabetes.
Why does my cheating ex-wife wear a colostomy bag?
She lost her ass playing poker...
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she was hit by a bus.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Thanos snapped.
So I got asked why I suddenly started wearing a beret, and I said, "Well, you never know when you need to pick a lock."
Why does the nurse need a red pen?
In case she has to draw blood.
Why?
Why did the feminist kill herself?
Because she was TRIGGERED.
Why did the egg cross the road?
'Cause he wanted to be scrambled!
Why did Steven Hawking not go to heaven after he died?
He could not get up the stairs?
Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from Kernel Sanders.
Hehehe
Three drunk men get in a taxi. The driver knew they were drunk, so he started the car and turned it off. The first man gave him the money. The second man thanked him, but the third man slapped the driver. The driver, surprised that he noticed, asked why, and the third man replied with, "Why did you drive so fast?"