Who is the most horny and fat ass god?
Kim Jung Un.
Whos Jokes
What do you call a rapper who's also a magician?
MC Presto.
What do you call a rapper who becomes a chef?
A LYRICAL COOK!
There's nothing quite like being told I'm wrong by someone who depends on me for food, clothing, and shelter.
"Did you hear about the flasher who exposed himself to two elderly ladies in Central Park? One had a stroke. The other couldn’t quite reach."
"I work with animals," the guy says to his Tinder date.
"That's so sweet," she replies. "I like a man who loves animals. Where do you work?"
"I'm a butcher," he says.
What do you call a wizard who can't secure a girl? Fumbledore.
Brrr, it's fucking cold outside, aye? What do you guys want for Christmas? A sweet video game? Maybe a cool action figure? Oh, how about the latest phone!
Who me? Oh, I guess... I wish snow could melt as fast as the snowflakes that downvote good jokes! Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals!
Angela: Kris, I just met the nicest, sweetest guy ever.
Kristie: Who is he and what is his name?
Angela: His name is Kevin.
Kristie: Kevin? I remember him. He said he had to go to Italy for a meeting, never seen him after that. What the hell is Kevin doing here?
Angela: I don't know.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Not the two Twin Towers.
All of you idiots who think that it is ok to laugh about us foster kids need to be shot.
The dirtiest football player in my school was the smallest.
He was just trying to find out who was tickling his balls.
Me: Knock knock.
My sister: Who's there?
Me: I eat mop.
My sister: I eat mop who?
My mind: I eat my poo.
My sister getting it.
My friend who is in a wheelchair told me a joke, and I burst out laughing. I told him he should be a stand-up comedian.
Who is buried in the tomb of Alexander the Grape?
Alexander the raisin.
Mia’s mother has 5 kids: Lilly, Abby, Alexa, Mila, and.... Q: Who is last? A: Mia.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady, you don’t need to yodel about it!
Hello everybody, now who here have watched Skurry?
Who crashed the plane?
1. Abu Faram? - terrorist
2. The little kid Joseph?
3. The passed out pilot?
Or Jamal?
My friend dumped me, so I stole their wheelchair.
Have a guess who came crawling back?
Who comes when an orphan gets married? They are allowed back in family restaurants, but when I go in alone, I'm not allowed. I have some parents, for God's sake!
