When jokes
Where does a suicide bomber go when he dies?
Everywhere.
When my Uncle Frank died, he wanted his cremations to be buried in his favorite beer mug.
His last wish was to be Frank in Stein.
Don’t you hate it when you are driving in a school zone and the speed bump starts screaming?
I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was just a kid.
The brain named itself, and when the brain realized that it named itself, it was surprised.
But maybe, it was a spelling mistake and the brain wanted the name Brian. We all have a little Brian in us!
It's sad when you sit around waiting for mom to make dinner, and then you realize you are the mom.
When your teenager asks for personal space and you remind her that she came out of your personal space.
Yo mama so fat that when she went on the scale, it showed her phone number.
Yo mama so fat that when Thanos snapped his fingers, she was still there.
Your mama is so fat that when she went to the scale, it said, "No elephants allowed!"
"Yo mama's so fat that when she farts, Al Gore accuses her of global warming."
"Yo mama so skinny when she swallowed a meatball, everyone thought she was pregnant again."
Yo mama's so old, she knew Burger King when he was a prince.
Yo mama's so stupid, when they said it was chilly outside, she grabbed a bowl.
How can you tell when a comic passes gas? Something smells funny.
What did the earthquake say when it was done? Sorry, my fault!
What did the tree say when spring finally arrived?
"What a re-leaf."
When does Friday come before Thursday?
In the dictionary.
What do kids play when they have nothing else to do?
Bored games.
When people ask my age, this is what I do.
“🥱 I DON’T CARE.... ÆAHAHAHAHAHAÆAAÆ!”