When jokes

Your mom is so weak, when she jumped from the Twin Towers, her baby became disabled.

When you're working in the Twin Towers, but you have to turn your computer to airplane mode.

I hate it when a couple has a minor quarrel, and the girlfriend updates her Facebook status to ‘single.’

I mean, I fight with my parents all the time, but I never update my status to ‘orphan.’

When ordering food at a new restaurant, my wife asked the waiter what they do to prepare their chicken.

“Nothing special,” he explained. “We just tell them they’re going to die.”

Yo mama is so fat, when she wore yellow, the kids thought they missed the bus.

Yo mama is so small that when she saw the Titanic, she called it the size of the Netherlands.

When there are more suicidal people, it means there are fewer suicidal people. That means there is an infinite generator of them.

I hate when people leave their cars running, especially in the summer.

I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"

When you see an orphanage bully, remind them that no matter how powerful they are, they will never be as strong as their dads... Oh wait, they don't have a dad.