When jokes

Jesus

  • Jesus and Moses come back to Earth.

    Moses says, "Let's go down to the ocean and see if I can do what I used to when I was here before." So Moses raises his arms and motions to part the waters. Sure enough, he is able to part the waters just as before.

    Jesus quips, "Close the water, I'm going to try to do what I used to when I was here last." So Jesus walks out on top of the water, then sinks to the bottom. He crawls out pulling seaweed off of him. Moses says, "Hey, it's not your fault, you didn't have those holes in your feet before."

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    Suicide

  • I told my mom to get rope for a project, and when she got home, I got the good old coat hanger out and hung myself up.

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  • Glass

  • If I was an object in this world, I’d be a glass! Because if you leave me when I’m too close to the edge, I will likely shatter and break.

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    Mama

  • Yo mama so fat, when she jumped in the ocean, the whales said, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me!"

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