When jokes
Why does Donald Trump love little boys?
Because his hands look massive when he’s holding their tiny little cocks.
Brinnia so fat when she stepped on a scale, it said, "I need a bigger one."
What does the cent say when it says hello? It waves.
What do you get when you cross a lesbian and a platypus? I lick a lot of pussy.
Your hairline is so far away that Jesus could've seen it when he was on the cross.
What do we want? A cure for obesity.
When do we want it? After lunch.
Yo mama so fat, when she was telling me her weight, I thought she was telling me her number.
Your mom is so fat that when she went on the scale, it said, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"
Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.
Hello! I hope you're having a good day or night! Mind commenting when you laughed the hardest and why? Like if you like this post!
What do orphans get when they go to a bank alone?
What happens when an asian with an erection bumps into a wall? he breaks his nose
Your mom's so fat, when she stands on the scale, it says, "To be continued..."
I love when I could run through the grass and feel the wind on my face.
Then my mom told me to get off VR, and then I wheeled myself to her.
when you don't have a phone to play Fruit Ninja and improvise.
I was joking about self-harm to my friend, and she told me to "CUT it out!" I couldn't even laugh.
When we were at the self-checkout, she started scanning my arms. I asked her what she was doing. She said, "Trying to see if it beeps, ya think I'd get it to work if I scanned your thighs?"
I said, "Nah, bro, you'd overload the system if you put it there."
Yo mama so fat, when she jumps, NASA says a meteor hits Earth.
What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?
Nothing, because fish can't talk.
Why did an old man fall in a well? Because he couldn’t see that well!
Why did the actor fall through the floorboards? They were going through a stage!
Why did a scarecrow win a Nobel prize? He was outstanding in his field!
Why are peppers the best at archery? Because they habanero!
What did the duck say after she bought chapstick? Put it on my bill!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
What did the three-legged dog say when he walked into a saloon? “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw!”
How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? It is either one or the udder!
What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint!
What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is very heavy, the other is a little lighter!
A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "That's my step ladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."