What's an edible part of a wheelchair?
A vegetable!
What is meals on wheels to a Christian nationalist that is also a conservative Republican politician, a gay man in a wheelchair that is poor and also physically handicapped, and who is also well-endowed?
What do you do with a dog that have no legs, - Take him for a drag
Apparently Steven Hawking was a stand-up kind of guy.
A girl was going through some really bad health issues at her house. It got so bad that she had to be rushed to the hospital.
Her husband found out about this after work and went to check on her. When he got there, the desk lady immediately pointed down the hall to a doctor. The guy walked up to the doctor, "Are you the one taking care of my wife?" The doctor glanced away from his papers, "Yes, that would be me, but I am afraid that she is in very bad condition. I have bad news and good news. The bad news is that she will have to be wheeled around in a wheelchair. Also, she can't eat normally. Taking care of her will become very hard. Basically, it will be like taking care of a big baby." Shocked, the guy says, "Wait, if that's the bad news, than what is the good news?" The doctor goes, "I'm just kidding with you, she died!"
Stephen Hawking died because he rolled to far from the outlet.
My friend in a wheelchair tells a funny joke.
I resist the urge to say that he should become a stand-up comedian.
He told me that he was in a wheelchair, and I asked, "Oh, wheely?"
Why don't you see gay people in wheelchairs?
Because once you're a fruit, you can't be a vegetable.
How do you know when a cabbage is boiled?
The wheelchair floats to the top.
If a person in a wheelchair runs you over, can you call it a "hit and can't run?"
Why was Stephen Hawking a bad influence towards kids? Because he couldn’t stand for anything
A dad is in a wheelchair and his daughter goes, "Don't step on a crack!"
Stephen Hawking listens to the song "I Am Still Standing" and cries to himself.
What do you call two old men drooling in their wheelchairs?
The 2028 US election.
One time, I took my wife to the doctors. My wife had a severe migraine and needed a medic. I waited for about 10 minutes.
The doctor walked out with my wife in a wheelchair. "Due to your wife's broken hip, she may never walk again," said the doctor. "She had a migraine," I said. "Oh, we know," said the doctor.
A person with a wheelchair makes a joke. No one laughs.
Inner thought: "Wheely Manerva, wheely."
What did the soldier say when he saw a terrorist in a wheelchair?
"An RC-XD!"
Stephen Hawking didn’t die naturally, his carer just forgot to put him on charge.
If the teacher tells you to stand up if you're not gay and there's that one kid in the wheelchair.
