Stephen Hawking would be a bad Pokemon.
He'd always be paralyzed, and his only move would be tackle!
Stephen Hawking died because he rolled too far from the outlet.
What runs faster than Stephen Hawking in his wheelchair?
His Internet.
Why don't they put petals on wheelchairs so when our arms get tired, we just use our legs?
I was in a public bathroom in a handicap stall, and when I got out, a handicapped man told me that I was an a**hole. I told him, "Bet you won't stand up and say that to my face," and then he broke down.
Why does Stephen Hawking do one liners?
Because he can't do standup.
When two wheelchairs hit each other, is it a fender bender?
What was the one test that Steven Hawking couldn't pass?
reCAPTCHA
I asked my mum to be in the Paralympics, and she said I had to eat more vegetables.
John saw a Gay in a wheelchair.
"I didn't know a man could be a fruit and a Vegetable!"
A blind comedian walks into a room, or did he? Dun, dun, dun!
My blind son got hit by a car when he was riding his new bike. He should have been paying attention.
He's in a wheelchair.
Apparently Steven Hawking was a stand-up kind of guy.
There's a new horror movie about Stephen Hawking.
It's called "Unplugged!"
Have you ever heard Stephen Hawking sing?
"Head, shoulders, wheels and frames, wheels and frames!"
Three disabled guys (a blind man, an amputee, and a guy in a wheelchair) are flying back with the USA team from the Paralympic games in the Middle East when their plane crashes in the Sahara Desert. The three disabled guys (the only survivors) are now stranded and wait for someone to rescue them, but no one showed. They start to get real thirsty, so they decide to seek out water. The amputee leads the way, with the blind man pushing the guy in the wheelchair; and, eventually they find an oasis. The amputee leader goes into the water first, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and lo and behold, he has a NEW LEG! He gets excited and encourages his friends to do the same.
The blind man offers to push the guy in the wheelchair, but he gets refused because the guy in the chair wants to be Mr. Independent and insists the blind man goes ahead first. So he goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and lo and behold, he can SEE! Now the guy in the wheelchair's getting really excited, starts pushing with all his might, goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, and wheels out the other side. Lo and behold, NEW TIRES!!!
Why don't wheelchairs have pedals, so when their arms get tired, they can keep going with their feet?
Where do people with no legs go to have fun?
Legnoland.
Stephen Hawking couldn't make it to Heaven because there were stairs, so he rolled down to Hell.
