Whats jokes

What is it called when an orphan takes a family photo?

A selfie.

What was the pedophile charged with when he was arrested? A minor offense.

What do you call a high school student?

Alone and depressed.

What do you get when a cow is caught in an earthquake?

You get a milkshake!

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What do a shopping cart and a wheelchair have in common? They both carry vegetables.

What did Hitler kill himself with? A "Nein"-millimeter.

What's worse than finding 10 babies in 10 dumpsters?

Finding 1 baby in 10 dumpsters.

What story does an orphan always get kicked out of? Home Depot.

What do you call a terrorist in a kids' swimming pool?

A bath bomb.

What’s the difference between an apple and a depressed kid? The apple falls from the tree.

What is the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie-talkie? He doesn't walkie or talkie.

The teacher told me to put my MP3 away, so I brought out my MP5. Now that bitch knows what not to tell me.

What's a lesbian's favorite type of food?

Finger-food.

What is the difference between a Rubik’s cube and a penis? I don’t know, but they both get harder the more you play with them.

What’s the difference between a child and a suicider?

One stays quiet forever...

A Catholic priest finds a young boy crying at the top of a cliff.

“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

The boy points down. “Mummy and Daddy were in the car and it went over the edge.”

The priest can see the flaming wreck below. He looks around and sees no one else is about and starts to unbutton his belt.

“It’s really not your day, is it?”

What do you call a gay drive by?

A fruit roll up.

1. What's the difference between Dark humor and Morbid humor? Dark humor is 10 babies in 1 trash can and Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trash cans.

2. What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

What do Michael Jackson and a Playstation have in common? They both get turned on by kids.