Whats jokes
Fat person: "Hey, what's up?"
Friend: "Your blood pressure!"
What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?
I've never had a lentil on my face.
Two terrorists walk into a bar.
The bartender asks what they are talking about. Terrorist 1 says, "We are going to kill 14k people and a donkey."
The Bartender asks, "Why a donkey?"
Then Terrorist 2 says, "See, I told you no one would care about the 14k people."
What do you call a fart in a gay bar?
A mating call.
What’s worse than finger banging your sister?
Finding your dad’s wedding ring.
Memes
Do you know this kind of kid
What did the man say to the deaf kid? He said...
What do you call a group of black men hanging from a tree?
Alabama wind chimes.
What is the difference between women and cars?
At least one of them retained their value after getting wrecked.
Why do lesbians shop at Sports Authority? Because they don’t like dicks.
What kind of cheese protects castles?
MOAT-zerrela.
Q) What do trees call deforestation?
A) TREASON!
What's the best thing about Switzerland?
I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite place to visit?
"Hee-Heegypt!"
What happens if an Asian with an erection walks into a wall?
He breaks his nose.
What do emo kids like to smoke?
"Marjuanakillmyself."
Why does Darth Vader always choke people?
Because he wants them to feel what his Sith Lord does to him in bed.
What does Micheal Jackson and a rock have in common?
They are both hard.
What's the difference between an emo and a banana?
They both hang like apples.
What kind of band never plays music?
What is Michael Jackson's favorite drink? Mi-hee-lk.