Whats

Whats jokes

Baby

What's worse than 3 babies in one trashcan?

One baby in three trashcans.

Hitler

What do Michelangelo and Hitler have in common?

They both used their brain to paint the ceiling.

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  • Keyhole

    Little Johnny's mom is taking a shower. Little Johnny walks in and asks, "What is that in between your legs?" Mommy says, "That is my keyhole." The next day, Little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and Little Johnny asks, "What is that in between your legs?" Daddy says, "That is my key." The next day Little Johnny says to his dad, "Looks like the neighbor has the key to Mommy's keyhole too."

    Boy

    A young boy enters a barber shop, and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."

    The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

    "What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"

    Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlor.

    "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"

    The boy licked his cone and replied:

    "Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!"

    Memes

    Fight

    What do you call a fight between an illegal immigrant and a pedophile? Alien vs Predator.

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  • Computer

    What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he's hooked up to? The computer runs.

    Difference

    Whats the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead hookers, i don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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  • Baby

    What's the difference between a baby and a salad?

    Most people don't get angry when you toss a salad.

    Emo

    Q: What did the drunk emo say to the bartender?

    A: Nothing! He was hung over.

  • 2
  • Morbid jokes

    A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says "What's wrong?" The woman says "I've never been hugged before." So, the man gives her a hug and walks away.

    The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says "What's wrong, now?" The woman says "I've never been kissed before." So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away.

    The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says "Oh, for Christ's sake! What's wrong, this time?!" The woman says "Well, I've never been fucked before." So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells "YOU'RE FUCKED!"

    Similarity

    What’s the similarity between a bag of chips and a gun?

    When you pull one out in class, everybody wants to be your friend.

  • 3
  • Johnny Depp

    What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an Aussie bloke in Bali?

    Both are expert drunks, but the Aussie is 100 times better kept. Johnny Depp, in contrast, looks like a demented leader of a violent drug cartel.

    Priest

    Roses are red, don’t touch the toys, these are what the priests use to lure in the boys.