Whats jokes
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple? The apple got picked.
Bored?
Burn an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What's the similarity between a broken pencil and my life?
They're both pointless.
What's the difference between my wife and a battery? I can't use a battery when it dies.
"Number 15: Burger King foot lettuce. The last thing you want in your Burger King burger is someone's foot fungus, but as it turns out, that might be what you get."
What do doctors say to patients who blow wind backwards?
DON'T PUT THE FART BEFORE THE FORCE!!
Me: I’m gonna smite the life out of you!!!
Orphan: What! No! Please no!
Me: What you gonna do? Run home and tell your parents? Wait, I forgot, you don’t have a home or parents!!!!
What was I saying again?
When your parents say, "We are sorry that you are here," what do you think of that?
I think that you're an accident!
Gumball: What's that? Is it a twig?
Banana Joe: No.
Darwin: Is it a leaf?
Banana Joe: No.
Gumball: What is it then?
Banana Joe: It's my BUTT!!!
When a military person dies, we shoot all night. When a drunkard dies, we drink all night. When a Christian dies, we pray all night. What if a prostitute dies? What should we do? Please tell me.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family photo.
What does NASA stand for?
Need Another Seven Astronauts!
So, this woman woke up since she had a bad dream and was yelling about her bad dream. Then, in the bed, her husband woke up and said, "Hey! You just woke me up in a sweet dream!" She said, "Oh, sorry babe." Then she asked him what his dream was about, and he responded like, "I was with a woman; me and her was in the middle of dreamy sex; you just ruined it!" She said, "AAAAh!" He asked her what her dream was about, then she replied as, "I was trying to suck a man's penis, and a cock trying to get cummiee out of it!"
What is a Mexican's only obstacle?
Border patrol.
What do you call a Mexican's prison?
The border.
What’s the hardest part about being friends with a turtle?
Getting them to come out of their shell.
Teacher: What is a cow?
Kid: Meat.
Teacher: Nice. What is a chicken?
Kid: Eggs.
Teacher: What does the big fat pig give you?
Kid: Homework.
What do ya call a legless prostitute in a strawberry field?
A jammy cunt.
What do you call a bunch of wheelchairs on top of one another?
A vegetable rack.