Whats jokes
What would you call a gay man's couch? A Homo Sectional.
What kind of bull doesn’t have horns?
A bullfrog!
Q: What season can an orphan see their family tree?
A: Fall.
If you don't get it, in the fall trees have no leaves, there [are] just empty branches, like an orphan's tree.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
What do you call a peanut on the allergy table?
A kill streak.
If O2 is H2O, what is F?
It is H2O too; F is water as well.
When an emo kid jumps out of a tree, what happens when he hits the ground?
Nothin' much, he just flops over an hour later when they untie the rope.
What's the similarity between a Christmas ornament and a person?
They both hang...
What do you call it when a town on the south coast of England sprouts legs and starts walking around the country?
A walkie-Torquay.
What do you expect when you get out of a bar?
Your mom naked LOLOLOLOL.
What did one cheese say to the other cheese?
"Hello, it's a nice day, do you have any plans on what you're going to do?"... The other cheese was taken back by his politeness and friendliness, they agreed to meet again, and were soon married and lived happily ever after. Let this tale of the two cheeses inspire you to be a better person.
What do you call an African American pilot?
A pilot, you racist bastard!
The other day while I was going down on my grandma, I thought I tasted a little horse semen and I got to wondering if maybe that’s what killed her!
What does an orphan call home?
Nothing. 🤣
What is an orphan's least favorite TV show?
"Full House."
What do you call an alligator that likes donuts? A donutator!
Three guys are in the woods, a really smart guy, an average guy, and a really dumb guy. They're bored, so the smart guy decides to go hunting. A little while later he comes back with a deer. The average guy asks, "How did you do that?" The really smart guy says, "I see deer tracks, I follow deer tracks, I see deer, I shoot deer." The average guy says, "I think I understand," and leaves. A little bit later he comes back with a raccoon. The really dumb guy goes *gasp*, "How did you do that!?" And the average looks at him funny and says, "Well, I see raccoon tracks, I follow raccoon tracks, I see raccoon, I shoot raccoon." The super dumb guy thinks for a second and says, "Oooohh, ok, I think I can do that..." and leaves.
Hours pass, and the guy finally returns, hurt, bloody, and horribly mangled. They run to help him. Finally, one of the guys asks him what happened. This is what he said: "I see train tracks, I follow train tracks, I see train, I shoot train. But train keep coming."
What does a baby computer call its father? Data.
What did a fat cow give you?
Homework.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack, then sell it again.