Whats jokes
What do you call a dwarf with autism? Matthew Michal?
What do you call the most fucking racist and obnoxious country in the fucking entire fucking omniverse? NORTH AMERICA!
And if you disagree just 'cus you're American, I don't give a fuck, you low life cunts. Plus, if you don't think you're racist, um, hello people? Motherfucking George Floyd!
Billy and Bobby were walking to school one day. Billy pulled out an mp3 player.
"What's that?" Bobby inquired.
"Oh, just something to zone out the other kids," Billy responded.
The next day, Billy and Bobby were walking to school. Billy rummaged through his backpack and pulled out an mp4 player this time.
"Woah! What's that?" Bobby inquired.
"Oh, just a lil something to shut out the annoying kids at school," Billy responded.
The next day, Bobby noticed Billy's backpack was particularly heavy looking. Billy rummaged through his backpack just outside the school and pulled out an mp5 rifle.
"Holy shit, dude! What the fuck is that for?" Bobby gasped.
"Nice huh? This'll shut those fuckers up for good!" Billy replied.
Everyone in my class: "I can't wait until I have a family, I can't wait to study for my dream job."
My friends: "What's your dream job?"
Me: "I'm going to die young :))"
What do sloths and depressed people have in common?
They both hang from the tree.
What type of meat do priests eat on Good Friday? Nun.
What do you call a retard with a boner? A slowpoke.
What is wet going up and wet going down but doesn't move?
A mountain!
hehehehehehehehehehe
What's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a computer?
I don't know, I have both!
Once I said to an orphan, "What the 'F' means in 'orphan'?"
He replied, "There's no 'F'."
Me: "There's no family."
What do you call Hiroshima and Nagasaki?
The world's first microwaves.
What do you call multiple quintuplets that look the same?
Naruto's mom.
What do you call a titan that can't swim?
TITANic
Q: What do kidnappers and rapists have in common?
H: It's similar to shoes.
A: White Vans.
What is the similarity between a sloth and a depressed kid?
They both hang from trees.
What happened to the dog that crossed the road?
What is an orphan's least favorite movie?
"Daddy's Home."
What is the definition of Hell, a city in the state of Michigan?
What do you get when you throw holy water on a cow?
A holy cow!
"Our all-transgender brigade has suffered heavy casualties!"
"What? We haven’t even sent them to fight!"
"They’ve already lost 30% of the unit!"