Whats jokes
What is the difference between a baby and a canoe?
I would never put a canoe in my garage.
What's an EMO's favorite game?...... DARK SOULS
What do you call it when an orphan takes a selfie?
A family portrait.
What did the orphan say to the other? "Quickly Robin, to the Batmobile!"
Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, “Mommy, mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs, and my ball got away and into your closet. When I went to get it, Daddy came in with the lady next door, and they started hugging and kissing. The lady next door took off Daddy’s clothes, and Daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed. The lady next door got on top of Daddy and started...”.
The mother cuts him off and says, “Just stop right there. You wait until your daddy comes home so you can tell him everything you just told me.” A couple hours later, the father arrives and walks through the door to find his wife and child with bags packed. She walks up to him and slaps across the face, shouting, “I’m leaving you... Go ahead, Johnny, tell him what you told me earlier.” Johnny steps forward to tell his daddy. “Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs, and my ball got away and into your closet. When I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door, and you both started hugging and kissing. The lady next door took off your clothes, and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed. The lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing Mom did with Uncle Joe last summer.”
What part of a vegetable can you not eat?
The wheelchair.
What do orphans call a family pic?
A selfie.
What is the difference between the President of Ukraine and the President of the United States?
The President of Ukraine is a comedian, and the President of the United States is a joke!
What is the difference between a comedian and a clown?
A comedian leads Ukraine, and a clown leads America.
What are the two hottest cities in the world? Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
What is the difference between an orphan and a criminal?
Only one is wanted.
Karen walks into McDonald's.
Lady at the counter: HI what can I get for you today??
Karen: I want 1 SMALL FRIES PLEASE AND MAKE IT SNAPPY LITTLE NOODLE!
Lady at the counter: yes miss.
Karen: I WILL NOW INSPECT THIS.
Lady at the counter: *sweats*
Karen: THIS IS NOT SALTY ENOUGHT! GET ME THE MANAGER KNOW, SKINY NOODLE!
Q: What's stronger than family?
A: Whatever tree Paul Walker hit.
What’s the best part of stage four cancer?
A: There’s no stage five.
What did the retard say when the water too deep?
"Deep deep."
Q: What’s the difference between Black Panther and Batman?
A: Batman “returns.”
Q: What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Adolf Hitler?
A: One got to finish a race.
Q: What’s worse than fingerbanging your sister?
A: Finding your dad's wedding ring.
What do you call a kid with autism who saw Star Wars?
Chewbacca.
What's the only good thing about being an orphan?
All snacks are family sized!