What's the fastest thing on earth?
An Ethiopian with a McDonald's Voucher.
Whats Jokes
"I'm thinking about killing off the main character in this book I'm writing."
"What type of book is it?"
"An autobiography."
What's the difference between an orphan and a toy?
One is played with.
What do you do if you see a nigger shot 50 times? Stop laughing and reload.
What's the difference between a prisoner and an orphan?
One is loved.
A man was shaving in the bathroom when all of a sudden Bubba, the boy he payed to mow his lawn, comes in to take a piss. The man can't help but look over his shoulder and he is surprised at how well endowed he is, and he asks: "Bubba, what's your secret?"
Bubba replies: "Well, every night before I get in bed with a woman I whack my dick on the bedpost three times. It works, and it sure impresses the girls!"
The man was excited at this easy suggestion and decided to try it that very night, before he went to bed with his wife. So he got to bed and whacked his dick on the bedpost three times and the wife wakes up and says "Bubba, is that you?"
What's the difference between me and an orphan's parents?
I actually come back with the milk.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One's actually picked.
What did the tomato say to the tomato ketchup?
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What is an army member's top drink?
WARter.
What is an astronaut's favorite letter on a keyboard?
SPACE.
What creature takes the most medicine?
Caterpillar.
What kind of tea is hard to swallow?
Reali-tea.
What's the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?
One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer; the other's just a watermelon. 😁😁
What makes Asians look like they're laughing at everyone? They're squinting before they hear the joke.
What’s the best part of raping an 11 year old girl?
Killing the little bitch after you’ve finished with her.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite type of car on fire? Hot wheels.
Someone walks up to his dad and says, "Dad, what’s the difference between potentiality and reality?" Soo ok, the dad says to the son, "Go ask your mother, sister, and your brother if they’d sleep with the postman for $1,000,000." So the son comes back 5 minutes later and said, "Dad, they all said they would sleep with the postman." So, son, potentially, we have a million dollars, but in reality, we have two sluts and a gay one."
What did the constipated bum say to the other bum?
Piss don't s**t on me!
