What did one cell say to his sister when she stepped on his toe? Mitosis!
Whats Jokes
What's red and white and lives in a blender?
A baby.
What's small, brown and crispy?
A baby in an oven.
Q: What do you call a man in a wheelchair?
A: Disabled.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite lunch? Eggs and shoulders.
What is red, white, and goes round and round?
A baby in a blender.
What do you call a psychic dwarf on the run? A small medium at large.
What do you call a lazy potato chip? Lays!
What do you call an animal with 3 eyes, 2 mouths, 6 noses, and 4 ears?
What does a man with no arms or legs do on Halloween?
Nothing.
What do you call a flamingo with 20 toes?
A flamingo.
I bought shoes from a drug dealer yesterday. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day.
What do monkeys and gorillas love to listen to?
The Monkees and Gorillaz.
What do you call a guy with a bald head who loves to eat biscuits, raisins, and caster sugar?
Gary Baldy (Garibaldi)!
What's the difference between a baby and a baked potato?
About 140 calories.
What's better than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree?
One dead baby nailed to ten!
What did the tie say to the hat?
You go on ahead, I'll just hang around.
What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick up your ass.
What is a frog's favorite drink?
Croaka-cola!
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on juan.