Q: What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?
A: One has hope in her soul and one has soap in her hole.
Whats Jokes
What did the trans woman say after finally telling her parents about her surgeries?
“It felt really good to get that off my chest.”
What's the difference between a casino and a church?
You actually mean it when you pray at a casino.
What did the blind kid say after receiving a cheese grater for Christmas?
"This is the most violent book I’ve ever read."
What did the sushi say to the bee?
Wa sa Bee.
What do you call a German that can not see?
A Not-see.
What is the autistic woman’s favorite Dorito flavor?
Neurospicy.
What did the autistic man order at McDonald’s?
Ass Burgers.
What Minecraft mob do autistic people relate to the most?
The Enderman.
What does a Jew expecting guests say?
"Oy, vey, are they here yet?"
What does a Jewish man say when he sees a caricature of his face?
"We need to circumcise that one."
An Indian has a seat between two Pakistani's on board an airplane.
It's quite obvious to each of the three men where they are from. The Indian asks, "Pardon me gentleman, you wouldn't mind me sitting between you, do you? This is my seat, after all."
The Pakistanis look at each other, and then look back at him. One of them smiles and says, "Not at all! After all, Pakistanis and Indians are brothers! Are we not?"
The Indian is delighted at how warm and friendly they are, and he takes his seat. Shortly the plane takes off and the three guys are just chilling until the Indian says, "You know it's going to be a long ride and I am getting thirsty. Brothers, can I get any of you like a drink?" Then one of them says, "Yes brother, I would like a Coke!"
The Indian slips off his shoes and walks barefoot to where the stewardess is at, and when the Indian is out of view, one of the Pakistanis spits into his shoe. The Indian comes back and gives him a Coke.
Then the other Pakistani says, "You know what brother? I would also like a Coke too!" The Indian happily obliges, and as soon as he is out of view, he also spits in his shoe before the Indian gives him a Coke.
Finally, the Indian slips on his shoes and suddenly realizes how wet they are. He shakes his head and says, "Brothers! Why must we do this to each other, spitting in each other's shoes and peeing in each other's Cokes?"
What is the difference between the government and organized crime?
Only one of them is organized.
What is a government mandate?
When Obama and Biden go out to dinner together.
What's something you can say in church and while having sex?
I come in the name of the Lord.
What’s another name for cumming inside a woman?
Loading the dishwasher.
For centuries the Catholic Church censored everything that wouldn‘t fit with their teachings. You know what I call that?
"Chancel culture!"
What is a dog's favorite snack?
RUFFles.
What do you call a bus full of transgender men? T-Mobile.
What do slinkies and the handicapped have in common?
They are the most fun when pushed down a flight of stairs.
