What do you say to someone's mom?
"You mom gay."
What do you say to someone's mom?
"You mom gay."
What did the author say when he got a correct answer? "I got it right!"
What did the flag say to the pole?
Nothing, he just waved.
What do you call a midget that waves at you?
A microwave.
If you're Canadian in the kitchen, then what are you in the bathroom?
European.
What was Stephen Hawking's mother's name?
Ilean.
What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and my Dad?
Isaac Newton didn’t beat me half to death with a pipe wrench.
What's a pirate's favorite key on the keyboard?
Others: R.
Rrrr, you would think so, but it be the C.
What did the blind kid get for Christmas? He hasn’t seen it yet...
What did the kids with no arms get? He doesn’t know, he’s still trying to figure out how to open it. :))))
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?
One's made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with, the other one carries your shopping.
I was hitting my hand, and my mom asked me what I was doing. I said I'm beating my meat.
If Carlos and Jose took a brownie from me and I had 10 to start, what do I have?
Answer: A math problem.
Doctor, what is wrong with me?
You will never be able to walk again. It ain't like with me on the field it would make the Miami Dolphins any better.
What's worse than 5 babies in a dumpster?
5 dumpsters in a baby.
What is the difference between babies and dogs?
I don't eat dog parts.
What kind of bug lives in a graveyard?
A zom-BEE.
What do you do to 7 to make it even? Take off the "s".
What's a cow's favorite war?
World War Moo.
What do you call a stupid male Indian?
"Anshu-man."
What is a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross-country!!!