Whats jokes
What's the difference between a man's wife and his dog?
Lock them both in the trunk for three hours and see which is happy to see you when you open it.
What do you call a bee that lives in America? A USB.
What do you think of your mom? I have to go now and tyyyytt.
What do you call that useless piece of skin that goes all the way around a pussy?
A woman!
What did the Los Angeles Police do when George Floyd said that he could not breathe? They gave George Floyd two squirts of Zicam cold remedy inside his nose.
What do you call a night guard at the glory hole inside a adult bookstore?
Guardian of the confessional booth.
What kind of tree fits into your hand? A palm tree.
I went up to a kid and asked, "Are you an orphan?" They said, "Yes, what gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."
What do you call cheese that's not yours?
Nacho cheese!
What do you call a toothless bear?
A gummy bear.
What was Pepe's best friend? Ballsack.
What do you call two Michael J. Fox's standing next to each other?
Parallel Parkinson's.
What's the difference between a suicide bomber and puberty?
Puberty waits for the blow up.
What do dogs eat? Dog food.
What do squirrels eat?
Nuts. 🥜
What’s the difference between being a genius and being an idiot?
Being a genius has its limits.
What is the fastest cake in the world?
Scone.
What’s the difference between an epileptic corn shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?
The epileptic corn shucker “shucks between fits”...
A guy goes to Starbucks and asks, "Hey, if I can make you laugh, I don’t have to pay." The girl in the window says, "Okay." The guy says, "A little boy named Timmy lost his arms." The girl says, "Oh no!" The guy says, "And his dad left him when he was 4." The girl says, "Uhh yeah." The guy says, "Okay, I guess I’ll be paying then." The girl asks, "Okay, and what name will that be under?" The guy says, "Timmy, I’m Timmy."
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie talkie? He can’t walkie or talkie.