Well-being jokes
My mental health.
What do you say to a depressed special kid?
“Why so down?”
Is depression an emotion or a state of mind? I call it a lifestyle.
To whoever stole my antidepressants, I hope you are happy now.
I hope ya'll that have depression kys; you are worthless trash.
Just kidding.
Take care of yourself
What is the difference between anal and oral sex?
Oral sex makes your whole day. Anal sex makes your hole weak.
Hey, you person who's scrolling, please leave your HONEST opinion on life. Do you think "life sucks" or "eh, it's okay," etc.? It can be short; if you don't want to, then that's okay.
My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed, but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.
Bros got barcode arms.
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
A suicide squad.
Everyone: "Wow, you're so nice and perfect! Your life must be great!"
*Reality of having depression* Me: "Oh yeah, I guess. 😀"
Why can’t orphans go to the hospital? Because they don’t get homesick.
My syndrome may be down, but my hopes are up.
How do you get a depressed man out of the tree? You cut the rope.
How do you tell if someone is depressed?
The brains on the wall.
Me: Hey, how are you?
Depression: I'm doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3
Insomnia: Mommy, can we get a home?
Anxiety: Insomnia, wait for mommy to finish.
Depression: Anyway, here is my resume!
Me: Okie, thank you. Ok... mhmmm... WOW! Okie, this is a nice resume! (Didn't Read it...)
Depression: Also, I have two more friends that want to move in too!
Me: Ok, and their names?
Depression: Their names are: PTSD and Trauma!
Me: Ok, they seem fine (Doesn't know about them)
Depression: Okie, here is the money (a penny :(). Thank you, we will call you if we need anything.
Me: Ok, see you soon! :3
Me now hates my life. :)
Things I would’ve missed if my suicide attempt didn’t fail in 2020.
My attempt in 2021.
And my attempt this year.
According to all known laws of aviation,
there is no way a bee should be able to fly.
Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.
The bee, of course, flies anyway
because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.
Barry! Breakfast is ready!
Coming!
Hang on a second.
Hello?
- Barry? - Adam?
- Can you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up.
Looking sharp.
Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those.
Sorry. I'm excited.
Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son.
A perfect report card, all B's.
Very proud.
Ma! I got a thing going here.
- You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me!
- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye!
Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!
Hey Gwen, reply to me and say if everything is alright.
My friend's emo. I told her to play jump rope with me. She hanged herself. Lol.