Weight jokes
Yo mama fat as fuck.
Yo momma so fat, her ankle broke and gravy poured out.
Which is the best sport at making fat people lose weight?
Canned hunting.
My dad said I need to eat more. I don't know why, but his fat ass needs to stop eating.
My friend was told by her doctor that she was morbidly obese.
As if she doesn't have enough on her plate.
You're so skinny, if someone farts in your direction, you will fly away.
Yo mama so fat that she broke the chair by sitting on it.
You're so fat that I run around you for exercise.
Yo mama's so fat, when she fell I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
You're so fat you can't see your penis when you piss.
Yo mama so fat, everytime she has to use the world's largest knife.
Your mum sunk in the pool because she had a big butt.
Yo mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, "To be continued," and it said, "Fuck you."
A fat man was checking his weight and sucking in his fat belly. A physicist saw it and said that's not how the law of conservation of mass works.
Plot twist: The fat man jumped on the physicist and proved him wrong. Now the physicist doesn't have mass.
Your mama so fat she sunk the HMS ship!
Yo mama so fat, she needs two watches for each timezone.
Yo mama so fat, when she jumped, gravity was no more.
You're so fat, you caused the Titanic to sink!
Yo mama's so fat, she invented double doors!
Yo mama so fat, when she went sky diving everyone screamed "METEOR!!!"