Video jokes

So Johnny Depp made an appearance on the MTV Video Music Awards as an astronaut. It really looks like he wants to be the new Elon Musk, whatever career path is most viable for Depp. I got to admit, if launching crystal meth into your nostrils and your anus is as viable as launching rockets to Mars, Johnny Depp would surpass Elon Musk in net worth.

Then again, the money Depp spends on alcohol each month, he could have bought all of Michael Bloomberg's penthouses in Manhattan. Sure sounds like he also shares the same financial advisor as Donald Trump, who thought it was a magnificent idea to launch Trump Airlines and Trump Ice. He already shares the same pro-Kremlin lawyer, by the way.

In my science class we were watching a video, and for no reason at all, it started talking about Black Lives Matter, and my friend leaned over and whispered, “White lives matter more!”

Who can relate?

NOT A RICK ROLL https://youtube.com/shorts/nnEQ5aWyO9U?feature=share

What's Link's favorite porn video? The Legend of Zeldas Sucking.

This video is its own joke. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0

You know how they said weight people can't jump? Check out the 9/11 videos.

Batman on gender equality: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/I36ypJEyYpo

If you thought other people’s puns are bad, well, you should sea mine.

What does a French woman say when you ask her what her favorite video game is? "Oui, oui!"

Video game company names always make me make puns I didn't intend to.

One night I was sitting on my bed in my room, minding my own business. It was pretty late, around 10 PM. The glow of my laptop screen was the only light in the room. I heard a noise coming from behind me. It sounded like the door was opening, but there was no one else in the house.

I turned around and found Mr. Incredible standing in my doorway, a stern look on his face. He walked over to me, slowly and dramatically. Then he leaned over and pointed his finger at my face, only about two inches away now. I was frozen with my back against the wall. Then, Mr. Incredible said something I would never forget: "Stop pirating video games."

Ever since that day, I have never gone on a pirating website and have paid legally for my video games. True story.

What do you call Hitler?

Gay.

I'm pretty socially awkward when talking to girls, so I watched a video on how to keep conversations going.

The guy said to try and find things that remind you of something else and talk about that. For example, "that oak tree over there reminds me of the one we used to climb in my backyard as a kid. It used to be so much fun... and so on."

So next time I was having a conversation with a girl, I saw a red truck. So I said, "that red truck reminds me of the time my house burned down when I was 6." She said, "oh, and the fire trucks came to your house?" And I said, "no, I was getting molested in a red truck when my house burned down."

Why do orphans love violent video games like GTA?

They never had parents to protect them from it.

Sub to Pwediepie!

Minecraft YouTube, but I can sing Believer!

YouTube, but I'm making a first video in YouTube.

And I record all the Minecraft videos and upload.

Ooohh! To try it and upload. Ooohh!

I've been recorded to streaming, couple more sleeps to do the dreaming.

I finally get to the stronghold, and if you told me, you told me, you told me, you told me.

Place some more ender eyes, and it's time to big surprise.

It's time to kill the ender dragon, go into the...

END!

Take that crystal, take that crystal, Believer, Believer!

Knock him down, knock him down, Believer, Believer!

Axe it's head, axe it's head.

Axe it's head, defeat him.

SUBSCRIBE!!!

"Never gonna give you up."

Why did the person get fired from the calendar factory?

Because they took a day off.

"AMONG US" AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US AMONG US

Have a sink in your house? Eat it.

Have a mouse in your house? Kill it.

Have a child in your house? MICROWAVE IT.

...just kidding. Now watch this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5tjtUFL0j4