USA jokes

I'm back and wearing dead whites who are killing whites from Eastern Europe on me. Shout out my boy russia and Ukraine, they all are evil just like USA and China and the rest of the west!

What is Instagram called in USA?

Instaounce.

Why are the UK and the USA bad at playing chess?

Because they lost 2 towers and their queen.

What do you get when you mix Harry Houdini, a basketball, and the 17th president?

Magic Johnson.

Somebody told me to go to hell, so I walked up to Donald Trump.

What do you say to the USA after 9/11? Checkmate.

Yo, if Russia comes to the USA, just know their reboot cards don't expire.

Your forehead is so big, they used it for the Berlin Wall and the USA border.

If you think of a president as your king, then the USA got checkmated on November 22nd, 1963.

You ever notice that the USA could be a part of Russia?

RUSSIA US A

Americans live in the U.S.A. The quiet kids live in the U.Z.I.

U.S.A: No Queen?

England: No towers?

You’re so fat,

that your family moved to the other side of the U.S.A., but they still see you.

GOOD MORNING USA!!!! I GOT A FEELING THAT IVE SEEN A FUCKIN NlGGER TODAY!!!

Why don’t Mexicans have an Olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, and swim are in the USA.

Iran: We can beat the USA.

Japan: You do realize we beat him in Battleship, and he dropped the sun on us.

Iran: So?

Japan: Twice!

Biden: Shut up, Trump, disrespectful!

President: You are the one with the inappropriate hair touching, bro. 😎😎😎😎😎😎

Biden: -laughs hard because sloppy Joe can't do anything.

I'm in school shooting. #USA

Jeff crosses the US border.

The second he crosses into the USA, a guy comes up with a gun.

Jeff: "That's what I was expecting."

What did the O say to the other O?

O hi O (Ohio).