USA jokes
Why are USA people bad at Clash Royale?
They lost two towers.
Your face is so greasy that the USA is gonna invade you!
Smoking a fag in the UK means to smoke a cigarette.
Smoking a fag in the USA means to kill a homosexual.
USA: "Never forget 9/11."
Brits: "What happened on the 9th of November?"
Why can’t the USA play chess?
Because they lost their two towers.
Your forehead is so big, they used it for the Berlin Wall and the USA border.
What's the difference between Canada and the USA?
In the USA, Trump is sitting in the Oval Office.
In Canada, he'd be sitting in the waiting room of a MAiD clinic.
The president of the USA is so damn stupid. His mother must have taken Tylenol while she was pregnant with him, or something.
The USA has school shootings. We Canadians have bus beheadings.
Japan takes credit for creating the rice cooker, but they forgot the USA made the largest one in 1945 and sent it to Japan.
Why can’t Americans play chess?
They lost 2 towers.
Why are the UK and the USA bad at playing chess?
Because they lost 2 towers and their queen.
Why were the UK and the USA bad at chess?
Because they lost their queen and two towers.
The USA guaranteeing freedom of speech is the biggest joke I've heard... Tell that to the people who were almost killed because their cars had "NASCAR Sucks" and "Country and Western is rubbish" on them!
If you think of a president as your king, then the USA got checkmated on November 22nd, 1963.
If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey, what would Delaware?
Idaho... Alaska!
You ever notice that the USA could be a part of Russia?
RUSSIA US A
You’re so fat,
that your family moved to the other side of the U.S.A., but they still see you.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jets versus towers, USA lost two.
How many Trump supporters does it take to fix a lightbulb?
None, Trump says it is all done and they cheer in the dark.