US jokes
What do genders and the Twin Towers have in common?
There used to be two, but now it's a touchy subject.
I posted up on my story that I got a new cut. My friends and family called the cops...
I used to be emo.
They never told us Humpty was an egg. A man died then!
How do you make people mad? You use the wrong category. It makes them go red.
Bunger got me like:
😂 Face with Tears of Joy Emoji - Emojipedia https://emojipedia.org › face-with-tears-of-joy A yellow face with a big grin, uplifted eyebrows, and smiling eyes, each shedding a tear from laughing so hard. Widely used to show something is funny or...
Memes
Your forehead is so big I could use it to get free TV.
Blossom: Why are we dating the Rowdyruffs when we're technically siblings?
Bubbles:...
Buttercup: I don't know, but those people over there are lookin' at us weird.
Alabama: 😈
Why can't orphans use a phone?
Because they don't have a home screen.
Q: What do you use on your tuba when it breaks?
A: Tuba-glue.
We split because she would always say I never listen, or something like that.
Your hairline's so far back even Bill Nye the Science Guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.
A telescope has two uses:
1. To look in space. 2. To see your hairline.
Why was the chicken in trouble?
For using fowl language!
Why can’t an orphan use an iPhone?
Because the home button does not work.
What's the easiest way to get straight A's? Use a ruler.
What do whales use to rub out a mistake in their homework? Their blubber.
Why was the piano waiting at the front door?
Because it forgot which key to use!
Why are women like KFC? After you finish with the thigh and the breasts, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.
Why do orphans use iPhone X's?
Because they can't find home.
What type of flour do orphans use to bake with...? Self-raising flour!