Ur jokes

Fat

5 views ·

You’re so fat that when you sit on the toilet, it says, “A B C D E F G, get your butt off of me!”

Teacher

10 views ·

If you have a teacher who is a Karen, comment what the worst thing that they did to you or your entire class. I know this isn’t a joke, but why not?

Kid

5 views ·

Kid: Where do I put this paper?

Teacher: I already said go ask your neighbors.

Kid: Ok. *Walks home to his neighbor's house*

Kid: Hey neighbor, I didn't know where to put this paper, and my teacher said to ask you. Do you know?

Neighbor: No, sorry, I don't.

Kid: Okay, bye! *Kid walks back to school.*

Kid: Teacher, my next-door neighbor didn't know.

Teacher: Ugh, you went home?!

Kid: Yes, you told me to!

Teacher: I meant at school!

Kid: Ohhhhhh!

Teacher: Duh!

Cannibal

184 views ·

Imagine this... you're a lesbian, and you're doing it with your cannibal girlfriend. You say, "Eat me, baby!"

She pulls out a knife and fork.

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  • Alexa

    10 views ·

    I called my mom on Alexa, and she told me, "Please take out the trash." I said, "But I can't, you're not here."

    Tattoo

    18 views ·

    (amazing pick up line) Yoo, what if we got matching tattoos? You get two towers and I get a plane, because I crashed right into your life!

    Ugliness

    49 views ·

    You're so ugly your mom and dad abandoned you, and you went to the adoption center, and not even the adoption center would take you or let you in.

    Mum

    10 views ·

    What do you call the woman that fucked sooooooo many hunks to have the condom break and a failure to be born? Ur Mum.

    Bank robbery

    11 views ·

    Bank owner: If you want to start a bank account, I need your name.

    Guy: Robin

    Bank owner: Your last name?

    Guy: Debank

    Bank owner: Robin Debank?

    Guy: Put your hands up and give me all the money!