Ur jokes

Tell your mom I don't like waiting in queues.

My teacher asked the class to stand up if you're dumb. No one did, so she said, "Come on, someone must be dumb," and pointed over to the left side of the classroom. Lil Jonny stands up. "Do you think you're dumb, Lil Jonny?" asked the teacher. "No, I just feel bad for you. You're the only one who stood up," replied Lil Jonny!

*P.O.V orphan wanting to go on school trip/camp*

Teacher: “Can I have your parent's signature? It isn’t filled out.”

Orphan: “Um yeah.... That’s gonna be hard....”

Teacher: “Why?”

Orphan: “I just have to find them first....”

My friend texted me and asked me, "Hey. What's your favorite emoji?"

I said, "😬😬😬😬😬😬😬"

She said, "Why?"

I said, "'Cause it's your twin."

So, I was in the bathroom at school washing up, and this girl walked out of the stall and she was like, "Hey, can you make me laugh? I have been having a pretty bad day." And I was like, "Sure." I was like, "Come here." So she came over to me. I was like, "Girl, look at yourself in the mirror." And she started laughing so hard, and she said, "I'm so ugly."

You have gaps in your teeth, looks like your tongue is in jail.

What did the flower say to the crazy peanut?

"Ur going nuts boii, get back on yo' plant. Ur too nuts for me."

Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.

Me: Why do you need to use shampoo when you are already bald? 🤣

Your forehead built like Darkseid from DC.

Why are a gun and a bag of chips alike?

You pull them out at school and everyone wants to be your friend.

Your mom is so fat that she works as a hydraulic press in a car factory!

You are American when you walk to the bathroom. What are you when you are in there?

You're-a-peein'. European.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. And your mom is, too.

Want to know why some astronomers are gay?

It’s because they want to be in Uranus.

You’re so fat that when you sit on the toilet, it says, “A B C D E F G, get your butt off of me!”

Your mom is so fat she was the reason why the Titanic crashed.

Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.

Me: I will f**k ur mom.

Orphan: I don't have one.

Me: ......

I know your hairline's pretty bent, but your gender's on a different level.